choose your attitude Archives | Page 5 of 6

i’m DONE!

Posted on by

Ready to cheer me on?

I told you a week or two ago in the smoking gun post, that I was going to do it – and now here I am!!

As of last night – I am a non-smoker.
A former smoker, an ex-smoker – call it what you will.

But as of when I went to bed last night – I am deciding to not stick another cigarette in my mouth.

I’ve said this before – and I’ve caved in.
Not because I’ve particularly wanted one, and certainly not because I’ve needed one, but because I have stupidly succumbed to ‘peer pressure’ (real or imagined!) and have taken it back up again – mostly because my Love has continued smoking.

This time can not be the same as previous times.

This time it won’t be.

Because this time I’m not “giving up” anything.

The fact is that I won’t be ‘giving up’ – I’ll be gaining!

Gaining back my life, gaining back finances, gaining back some health, gaining back the ability to breathe more freely, gaining back time!

Most people don’t realise how much time that smoking sucks out of the day.
And I fully believe that thats why a lot of people restart – simply because they don’t know what to do with all the time they suddenly find on their hands – and they’ve done nothing in the lead-up to stopping smoking, to ensure that they have strategies in place to combat the feeling of ‘what do i do with myself now‘….!

Personally, I’ve spent the last two weeks working out how I will combat those moments when I’d usually go for a ciggie – because all it is, is habit!

Its a habit to have one after a meal, its a habit to have one with my coffee, its a habit to have one with a glass of wine, its a habit to have one when on the phone, its a habit to have one before bed …… every.single.stupid.cigarette is a habit.

An idiotic lethally toxic habit that is poisoning our bodies, and sending us ever more quickly closer to the grave…

But ya know what?

Not any more!

I’m done!

Feel free to cheer for me – cos I sure am 😀 😀 😀

I’m DONE with the Monster on my back!

The breakfast of a champion non-smoker

15 nuggets

Posted on by

1. You are not your body and your body is not you but you best look after each other anyway.
You might be together for a while.

2. You’ll never have more potential than you do right now, so find a way to use more of what you’ve got.

3. You think too much.

4. It’s not a time issue.
It’s a how-you-manage-your-time issue.

5. You’ll never be perfect, so aim for better.

6. You’ll never live in the future or the past, so find a way to be happy in the now.

7. Your beliefs, standards and rules will change over time so don’t get too self-righteous about your current ones.

8. Life doesn’t get better, you do.
Life is life – it will happen to you, around you and despite you.
It’s your job to get better in the middle of it all.

9. Your body is not the problem.
It’s the consequence.

10. You’ll never find yourself in things.
So stop looking there.

11. Even though you might not feel it, think it, believe it or hear it, you are good enough.

12. Your happiness works from the inside-out.
Not the other way around.

13. Things only have the meaning you give them.
Every day, you get to create your own reality.
So choose your labels wisely.

14. Nobody can take your power but you can give it away.
Master your fear and you’ll master your life.

15. Real success is not about what you earn, own, achieve or win but who you become along the way.

gettin’ closer

Posted on by

Its a year on from my “one step at a time” post – and I’m reflecting a bit about where I am now as opposed to this time last year.

Some things haven’t yet changed.

I am still at my job as a Manager, I am still working three days a week, and I’m still not a full-time HouseSpouse.
YET!

A lot has change though…

We have the house in town on the market – for sale.
We have moved full-time into the FarmHouse.
We have stacks of garden beds that are flourishing with edible produce, that fills our bellies with wholesome homegrown goodness.

We have enough surplus veggies that I am able to do canning so that our pantry shelves are stocked with a variety of foods that we know the ingredients of, and I routinely make our own bread.

We have chickens that supply us with all of our own fresh eggs, and we home-cook 95% of the food we eat.

I have managed to reduce our food budget substantially.
I have also paid off a lot of credit card debt, and will hopefully have paid off the remainder of it in less than a year.

We also no longer have cable tv or home phone line payments to have to find the money for.

I have reduced my clothing spending significantly, although we are going to need to buy some new-to-us work shirts soon, as the ones we currently share are getting a bit faded and threadbare lol.

And – we’ve reduced our power and water consumption!

I may not be as close to where I want to be as I would like – but I am certainly a lot closer than I was a year ago – and for that, I’m pretty darn proud of the headway I’ve made…

: strength :

Posted on by

bar

Strength doesn’t come from what you can do;
it comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t do.

When you are at your lowest point,
you are open to the greatest positive change.

Happiness is not the absence of problems,
but the strength to deal with them.

The strongest people are the ones who feel pain,
accept it,
learn from it,
and fight through it.

They turn their wounds into wisdom….

Sarah

i did it again!

Posted on by

It was a bit of a shit ending to 2017 for me…

I somehow managed to put my back out again – whilst getting up from the toilet.
How does that even happen!?!?

I spent that day being pretty damn teary and miserable – I didn’t feel like I could go through another few months of being bed bound and rehabbing all over again – but then of course, if this isn’t just a short term flare-up, I don’t have any damn choice in the matter, other than to start back at square one!

Theres also the issue of finances…
My Love has just changed jobs, and needs to re-build her contacts, and get some Sales back under her belt so that the income is back to ‘incoming’, and of course the old employer hasn’t been at all forthcoming with information to her customers when they ring up to get a hold of her – which whilst i know is definitely well within their right, and is totally expected – but it still feels kinda shitty (& petty)…

At the same time – even though the income isn’t what it usually is – the out-goings remain as they were prior to the move, and my part of the income is definitely needed right now, just so that we can eat – so a period of enforced time away from my work and the associated pay-cheque – scares the living daylights outta me!!

Its now almost a month since that happened, and I have been back at physio, had a fortnight of half-days again, at work, and am slowly on the improve.

Its a mentally difficult thing having it in the back of your mind every.single.moment of every.single.day – that at any moment, I could be laid up indefinitely…!

I don’t want to live every aspect of my life being super-careful, but i also know I cant just jump right on in and do everything that i either want to do, or have always done.

Its all a matter of learning and respecting my own limitations.

Not an easy thing – and something I know i will slip up with from time to time – but I’m trying to be sensible!!
One day at a time…

the murky depths [2]

Posted on by

In Part 2 we’re ready to talk more about those other things on the list in my previous post, namely: clothing, takeaways (food/coffee), cigarettes/alcohol, car expenses, meals, hairdresser / hair products / mani-pedis, social events and growing-your-own.

So – lets get into it!! Continue reading “the murky depths [2]”

today…

Posted on by

Today is different.

Today I got out of bed quite well rested.
I had a really decent sleep last night, because it rained through the night, and i always sleep soooo much better when it rains.

I have also taken a fortnight off work – which actually winds up being 18 days – so that is a big load of stress gone off my back for the time being!!

And to top it off, I also slept well because My Love & I came to a very important decision last night, Continue reading “today…”

anxiety

Posted on by

I only work three days a week – Tues, Wed, Thurs – so I am lucky in that I get a four-day weekend.
In theory…

But these days – my work environment ramps up my anxiety like almost nothing else – so after those three days, I spend Friday pretty much uncoiling from thorough mental, physical and emotion exhaustion.
At least ½ of the day is over, before I start to feel even vaguely like ME!

Come Monday, although I try to schedule my day so that I am relatively busy and not giving myself too much time to think – I can still feel that no-so-subtle tightening in my chest and belly, as the anxiety begins to percolate deep inside of me – with the knowledge that tomorrow I have to go back to work…

Anxiety is such a futile, debilitating waste of time – and I gotta tell you – it SHITS ME OFF!!
[ohhhh for a magic wand…]

We’ve had some storms over the last few days, with good torrential downpours, so today while the ground is still nice and soft and the sun is shining, I am going to plant out some of the potted stuff from our nursery, rather than having to put them into bigger pots.

That will calm my soul!
At least for a little while…

How do YOU handle your anxiety?

A great article about anxiety can be found at “The Mighty“.

comparisons

Posted on by

I’m having a bit of a ‘comparison’ dilemma at the moment and whilst I know that comparing oneself to others is never a healthy or helpful thing – I’m just not quite sure how to get it “out of my system”…

It makes it that much harder – because the person I am making the comparison with, is my Love.

My Love is 5 years older than me, and is a healthy happy vibrant person, who loves Continue reading “comparisons”

a quickie

Posted on by

After yesterdays mammoth post, I thought today would just be a ‘quickie’ 🙂

Sometimes – just cleaning up and sorting out a small corner of your home, can make a huge difference to how you feel about the rest of the day.

I had had one of those mornings where I came back to the Farm feeling pretty crappy, frustrated and annoyed. Continue reading “a quickie”